I'd like to give you a gift...

Falling into SOFTNESS

Falling into SOFTNESS
January 6, 2022 Charli Wall
In Blog, life coach, mental health

I hope you have had a very happy festive period, and I want to wish you a very happy new year from my heart to yours.

For the first time in a loooooong time I allowed myself to ABSOLUTELY REST!

I switched off my social media, my laptop, and my phone, and sunk into the space of having nothing to do – well, after Boxing Day anyway!! (And I appreciate that I don’t have young children or parents who need me any longer, so I am able to do this!)

BUT – actually giving myself the space TO do nothing is new for me!

Falling into the softness

My softness

A soft space of nothing


And – it was GREAT!

As an A-type personality, uber driven, bossy, control freak, and fairly ambitious person, who was always pretty determined to achieve anything I put my mind to, “soft” or “softness” is not a word or adjective that would ever have been used (either by me or anyone else) to describe me 😀

Up until a few years back “soft” to me would have conveyed weak, flaky, fluffy, flighty and ineffectual.

But that no longer resonates in my ‘softened’ body 😉

A few friends have commented recently “Charli, you have softened”.

Whilst in the past I would have been affronted by such an observation, today I see it as nothing short of the greatest compliment.

A beautiful yin counterbalance to my ever raging yang.

A sign of stepping into, and celebrating my feminine, while simultaneously holding fort as the owner of my latest business creation.

How did this happen?

Like most profound changes in my life, it happened slowly, and gradually, until it morphed into every aspect of my daily life, typified my actions and thoughts, and eventually became a way of life. 


I am still exploring and learning about this feminine energy, and currently working with a rather brilliant coach myself (walking my walk, talking my talk!)

And there is something VERY magical about this exploration that excites me, and I hope to continue sharing this with you as I embody this deeper KNOWING of who I really am – whilst continuing to remind you who you REALLY ARE dear one.

One of my clients recently summed up her realisation of her greatest frustration with herself: “I’ve hardened. I constantly shout at my children, I’m anxious and controlling. I’m short-tempered. I’m bossy. I’m exhausted. I’m constantly frowning I am not sure I am even a good friend to anyone anymore. I’ve become too hard.”

I’ve walked in those shoes.

For most of my life 😬

And many 40-something-year-old women that I have had the honour of speaking to confess that they feel exactly the same way.

On a scale of 1 to 10 (with 1 feeling “soft and feminine”, and 10 feeling “hard”) almost every woman that I spoke to before Christmas ranked themselves higher than a 6.

And they were not happy about it.

Where would you rate yourself?

Being hard, it seems, is not something that the women of today want to be.

Even a cursory perusal of social media streams and newspapers clearly show that more and more women today are embracing, or wanting to embrace, their femininity, and take a gentler, softer approach.

So, in light of ‘walking my walk‘, I embraced the space of no-thing from Boxing Day to January the 1st and this is what I learned.



It really is that simple

So simple really, that it is almost laughable that for most of my life I haven’t known HOW to be kind to myself – I could absolutely take care of YOU (or anyone else for that matter), but me – not so much.

One of the things that I realised over this period was that I had lost that essential connection with myself, with my intuition, with my body’s wisdom, with my divine feminine – my essence, and that had trickled into all areas of my life

I had become so busy, and back into the habitual space of DO DO DO – that I didn’t hear my body gently asking me to stop, to rest, to drink water.

Being kind to yourself isn’t just about having a nice bubble bath with some meditation music on

It is genuinely about making time to LISTEN to what YOU need.

What YOU want

What YOU desire

(and not what everyone else needs, wants or desires!)

I can speak about more of this – if this topic or subject calls to you Janie?

My plan for 2022 (One of them) is to create a new COURAGE DEAR HEART podcast episode every NEW MOON over in my Facebook group  where I hope you will help me to co-create a brilliant episode

I also have the wonderful Michael Neill lined up to be a guest on my podcast, and (again) that will be live-streamed over in my Facebook community on the 31st of January (all being well)

So gorgeous woman, would you like help to find out what you truly desire?

Could you see yourself in a place of true acceptance of YOU?

Send me an email and let’s chat!


Love, Charli x 

Comments (0)

Leave a reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *